 Hey guys, welcome back to my channel, my name's Gloria and thank you so much for clicking on today's video. Today, I'm just having some oatmeal so I topped it with apples, red delicious apples, those are my favorite. And one that's in some shredded coconut with a little bit of protein powder just for a little bit of extra calories and protein. So this is kind of what I eat on a regular basis. I'm just going to jump right in. I don't always eat like super crazy unhealthy foods so I like to keep it pretty simple like first thing in the morning. That's what I'm having and I also have some like sweet tea here. Mmm. So yeah, I mainly just wanted to turn on the camera so I can talk to you guys. Mmm. Love walnut. So I met up with my friend yesterday. I caught up having dinner in a couple of months. Apples and cinnamon, like it just completes my meal. Like it is like apple pie. I can't go back to just eating plain oatmeal anymore. It's just, no. Look at the apples. Yeah, so I met up with my friend. We used to live together back when I was in undergrad at university so when I was studying at Waterloo. And we were just catching up. It's been a few months. She's still in school during like a graduate program and I'm working now, right? So we're just sharing stories and stuff like that. We're both very similar in the way we like think about things or morals or beliefs. Like the way we do things, we're just very similar. That's why like she's honestly like my best friend and I'm so glad like we still keep in touch even though like I left Waterloo like five years ago. So we got to talking. And we started talking about our insecurities. So I wanted to share some of my insecurities with you guys and just talk about this topic because everyone has insecurities, nobody's perfect. And like if you think you're perfect, you're wrong. Like everyone has something they would want to change about themselves and that's normal. So for me, I mean, it might be like the culture that I've grown up in or like how my family and my friends kind of treat me but I've always been the bigger friend amongst like all my friends. So I'm tall. I'm like five, six. So that's pretty like, that might be the average type for you guys but like for an Asian, it's like pretty tall. So yeah, I'm pretty tall and like I'm like bulky. So I'm like, I'm not like thin, you know? Like I'm not like dainty and like this cute little Asian girl. No, I'm not like I'm just mean like I'm a little bit on the bigger side but I wouldn't consider myself fat. I'm just like bigger than everyone and like my family is so short. They're all like tiny little people. They're thin, they're skinny. Like it's like skinny fat, right? And then I'm just here like this giant monster like towering over everybody and it's just like eventually it gets here, right? When people make comments like, oh like did you gain some weight or all like have you heard of this new diet? Like excuse me. So obviously I'm a bit more comfortable with my weight now but like back when I was in high school, this was like unhealthy. Like I'd be so scared to eat even like a small bag of like snack sized chips. Like I would think it would be the end of the world and I get so fat. Like you shouldn't think like that especially when you're young, you're growing, you're learning more about yourself and I definitely don't recommend that. So now I'm more about kind of living a healthy lifestyle as opposed to being skinny and looking a certain way. So obviously like there's benefits in being healthier, right? Like exercising, eating better, thinking about the calories that you're intaking and the new trend set it comes with in the food. So yeah, weight has always been an issue with me. The second thing is my nose. So I hate eating shots where it's just my profile because like I think my profile is just awful. My nose is still flat. I know a lot of Asians have flat noses but not everybody. So I tend to take photos like kind of straight on because my nose just looks small, right? But then when you look at it from the side, let me show you guys. Can you tell? Like I don't know those guys. I have no nose bridge and I wear glasses so it always slips down. So yeah, when I take pictures, I go front on. And then when I take pictures of my boyfriend, oh my god, he's got like the best nose for an Asian. It's so tall. It's like beautiful. So I just like always want to touch it and like I guess I'll mind. He thinks I give him nose leads for touching his nose. So yeah, I've always been super insecure about my nose because when you press on it, like honestly, it's just flat. What nose bridge? But I've never really seriously considered getting like a nose jaw, plastic surgery for my nose. First of all, it's way too expensive. Like in the thousands, right? I feel like that's just appearance and you just at some point need to be okay with it. So for me, I'd rather do like laser eye surgery to correct my vision because it's more like purposeful. Like there's actually like a reason to do it. Just because I don't like wearing glasses. Sometimes it slides off due to my nose, like no nose bridge, even if I do have like the nose pieces. And also because my nose gets really sweaty, like it also makes the glasses like slide right off. And I don't really like wearing contacts. So I usually just go blind to what I'm going out, but I work. I work with glasses. So it's not that I don't like wearing glasses or I can go to the bad and glasses. I just think I look better with out glasses. So then like between work and going out, if I like hang out with like my colleagues or coworkers, they can never recognize me without my glasses. And I'm just like sitting here like, do I really look better for it? I think glasses like add to my character, but they're just in inconvenience with like sports, working out, sweating, being outside. Like when it's cold outside and then you go into like a restaurant and it's like hot, like your glasses like a ball go. It's so embarrassing. Oh my god, I hate that. Yeah. So these are, I would call normal appearance insecurities that like I can see that there's an issue or like a problem or whatever about myself, about my appearance. But there's ways to fix it or you just learn to deal with it, right? But here comes the funny part. There's like irrational fears and insecurities that I have that I'm like, why do I even have them? Like they make no sense. So let me tell you about those. So I have this like, I have like abandonment issues. I know where it stems from. So it does make sense. But like in the current situations that I'm in, they don't make sense at all. So I come from like a divorce family, right? So I grew up in like an environment where relationships end. They don't work out. A lot of bad things happen. But like my parents are on good terms right now, which is great. But that just kind of stuck with me. It didn't really stick with my brother or anything, but it stuck with me. So I have this irrational fear that my boyfriend is going to leave me for some other girl. So it's not like a jealousy thing. But I don't feel threatened when he's talking to a cute girl or like his friends are cute any of that. I just have this irrational fear where I think I'm not good enough and he's going to leave me because I do something wrong. And like our relationship is great. It's like we have our fights here and there, but we always work out when we compromise and we talk things through. So like I would say that's a great relationship, right? So he knows I have this. So how he helps me with this is if you guys haven't heard of the like five languages of love, you guys definitely need to take that quiz online. So for me, my top like languages of love are words of affirmation. And the other one was like physical touch. So I feel like really loved when he says really nice things to me and it helps me get over these fears of him leaving me because like I know like deep down like he's not going to leave me, right? Like I didn't do anything wrong or relationships great. It's healthy. It's strong. Everything is like perfect. But then I have this like I have this insecurity, right? So then when he says like oh, I love you babe, or like you know you're you're the only one for me like cheesy stuff I got like we don't need again to details because that's that's too much. Or like him hugging me or like holding me in his arms or like you know grabbing my hand when we're just walking. Like I do these things too to show that I love him. But like when he does things like that for me like it just feels like really good. It means he feels really good about myself. And it just helps reinforce the fact that like you know like he shows affection, he shows affection in a way that makes me feel like he's showing affection because not everyone feels this way right? Some people like spending quality time together which I mean obviously I do too. But for me words of affirmation definitely trump quality time. That's just what makes me feel like special. So I think if you guys are in a relationship it's really important to share your insecurities with each other and help each other go through it because that's what makes relationships healthy communication. So if you talk about everything let each other know not be afraid to open up to someone and it's so much better. That's my two cents on it you know. Honestly everyone has different insecurities though. This tea is really good. It's so refreshing. I just added a bit of sugar while the tea bag was steeping in some of that cold water just a little bit. Pretty much put this much and then after I steeped for five minutes I took out the tea bag and then just added a bunch of ice. Fill it up to the top and that's like my little ice sweet tea thing. That's my favourite topping. It's like one apple. Okay so I hope you guys will be nice in the comments. If you have your insecurities and you want to share that with me leave a comment down below in the comments section and I'll definitely read them and reply to you guys. And if you haven't already make sure you subscribe to the channel so you can join our cheeky fam because I upload tons of mukbangs and I talk a lot about relationships and different little stories. I'll see you guys in the next video. Bye.